should I ??

the intro

i'm the youngest single girl in my office, among a group of  ladies the youngest one of them is 37 or something

so far they are kind to me, always voluntarily showering me with advices about handling other co-workers

and teaching me how to do my work, or to be more accurate they end up to voluntarily do my work against my well and i accept their bossy actions, with a smile 

i don't wanna lose anyone and i don't want anyone to hate me, plus i'm still exploring the atmosphere

since my day one at the new work place i decided to challenge myself, not be judgmental, and just explore people, i decided not to reject people just because the seemed different than me in look, in mentality, in life perspective.. and above all i didn't want to do the thing i do best, the thing i always did which is "finding my way out of troubles via any mean/ taking the easiest way 

so far the plan is going fine, i am learning new stuff about life, people, work on a daily base

i'm bonding with new people

and.... i am ok , just ok not sure if i'm happy, but i'm calm, content and thats what matters 

i am pushing myself to positive thinking each morning, focused on keeping a healthy feelingless routine to my day don't want any extremes, even my famous mood swings i find technique to handle them ..

 the situation:

today at work one of my females co-workers said" i mostly like you for being on your nature, and followed don't let life change you, don't be artificial !!"

the thought:

i don't know if she mean this in a good or a bad way yet I said to myself 

"YES there's many things others won't do if they were me"

but they're not me.. 

and I am not them.. 

never will be, 

and not sure I want to be.. 

not in this aspect at least..

So, doing my stupid mistakes is better than faking someone else's smart actions.. 

the wisdom of the day:

"till it stops being painful".. it won't.