Thursday, June 30, 2011

for some people there is no choice possible.

I always stood up for my belief that happiness is a choice, people quote me for this say 
recently someone quoted "happiness is a choice" while i was around. 
and actually i was board so i gazed into the unknown thinking of my saying

IT has the feel of truth at least to me.

 I know when I'm normal happiness IS a choice.
 It's something I choose to be. I don't let all the little buggy boos in life get me down.
 I choose to be happy and thus I am.

But there are times when that's just impossible.

 When I am deeply depressed, way down there, I am incapable of choosing happiness and even if I could choose it it would mean nothing.
 When I'm way down like that my attention must always be focused on survival. I must keep my attention on making it through.
 I cannot let my focus wonder lest I lose the battle and potentially lose my life.

It's times like this that happiness becomes an unreachable goal. 

For whatever reason, be it situational, a chemical imbalance in my head, or whatever, I am way too far down in the dumps to be able to choose happiness. It's all I can do to survive.
 As much as I long to choose happiness, as much as I try, I find it to be an unreachable goal many times lately.
 The sadness, the darkness, is overwhelming and leaves no room for happiness.


lately i have a feeling that there's something that sucks all the light and life out of me and leaves me unable to make the choice to be happy. 

I just wanted to clarify that. Someone suffering from  depression is simply unable to choose happiness.

 While for the vast majority of us happiness IS a choice, 
for some people there is no choice possible.
 They are not to be faulted for not choosing happiness.
 They would make that choice if at all possible. 
i realized that It just isn't an option for everyone to chose happiness.

No comments:

Post a Comment