Friday, June 19, 2009

Is Love Blind?

Is Love Blind? What's The Big Deal With Love? Have you ever watched a friend in love do things they vowed never to do? It's like they are in another world! When the relationship is over the common statements are, "I can't believe I did that!" or "What was I thinking to allow that to happen!" I have found love to be blind because it is neutral! It doesn't see your faults. It doesn't judge you. It only knows what's in your heart. Yet, that's a good thing! Imagine love having stipulations on how one should love. Wouldn't that be weird? That's what millions of people do each day! Love being blind does not cause people to go through or stay in difficult and unhappy relationships. It's the individual who allows themself to stay that cause the problems. Each person has their view of what love is. Thus, they take a neutral feeling and make it conform to their view of love instead of accepting love as it is. That's where the problems begin! The different views of love often conflict. For example: * One person expects hugs and kisses every day while their mate isn't affectionate. Yet, he/she may show their love by being a provider and expect their mate to understand that. * Another person expects to hold conversations about the day during dinner while their mate just wants to eat and go to bed * Someone else may like to cuddle and hear I love you often while their mate prefers to show their love and give hugs instead of cuddling The point is once you tell love what it should be you set yourself up to be disappointed every time. But it goes deeper than that. You must identify the source or root cause of the problem. What causes a person to tell love what it should be? For some reason you seem to think you know what's best for you when it comes to love! This stems from your BELIEFS. That is the real problem! At one time in your life you were taught, learned or discovered what true love was and it stuck with you. Consequently, when you don't get love the way you were told or taught something must be wrong. You have to correct the problem (make love into what you think and feel it should be). Can you see how you can screw up a relationship by doing this? The solution is simple yet difficult. All you have to do is trust love and go with the flow. Things will not go the way you would like. However, that doesn't mean you will not end up at your destination (i.e., married, in love, with children, happy, etc.) All I'm asking you to do is give love a chance to show the way before you decided to take control! Finally, if your way was such a good way why is it you are still searching for love? Obviously, something is missing!

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